We lost a little girl who was very special to us exactly four years ago today. Her name was Juntara. I called her Moonstar here on the blog, the literal Nepali translation of her name. It's kind of unbelievable how much I still think about her, how much I use her strength to carry me through times of loss and despair. I still very much feel her presence and remember her voice. I try to picture what she would say to me during certain difficult situations. She always gives the wisest advice. The thought of her always makes me smile and then occasionally break out into tears. I miss her a lot.
The idea for the school came when I was sitting with her in the I.C.U. I told her all about it. I pictured her coming to visit some day and wrote the grant application for the Do Something awards while she slept and recovered from her surgery. I was so devastated when she died, I barely had it in me to hit the submit button on the application. But I did and just a few months after she passed, I found out that we won the $100,000 to build our school. I still think she had a lot to do with that.
We posted a poem by E.E. Cummings the day she died. I still read it every day on March 4th.
Love you J. Thanks for being our guardian angel up there.
[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]
BY E. E. CUMMINGS
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)